First Homes and Second Homes: What Living in France Taught Me About the Meaning of Home
Introduction
Lately, I've found myself writing quite a bit about houses and homes. The more I think about the topic, the more I realize that our relationship with home says a lot about our culture, our work, and even our definition of success.
As a Thai woman living in France, I've had the opportunity to observe two very different perspectives on homeownership. What started as a simple comparison between Thailand and France has gradually become a reflection on how differently people choose to build their lives.
Growing up in Thailand, owning a home is often seen as one of life's biggest milestones. For many people, the dream begins with buying land, building a house, or purchasing a home that will become the family's long-term base. A first home is not just a place to live—it represents stability, achievement, and security.
This mindset is closely tied to the way many Thais work and build their careers. Traditionally, people often stay with the same employer for decades, especially in government positions or large organizations. When your workplace, community, and family are all located in the same area, it makes perfect sense to invest heavily in a home that you expect to live in for most of your life.
Before moving to France, I assumed that this was a universal goal.
I thought that once people had a stable income, their next priority would naturally be to buy a home as soon as possible. But after living here and talking with French friends and colleagues, I discovered a very different way of thinking.
Many French people seem less emotionally attached to the idea of a "forever first home." Career mobility is much more common. Changing jobs, moving to another city, or even relocating to a different region is often considered a normal part of life. As a result, homeownership tends to be viewed with more flexibility.
One thing that surprised me is how common second homes are in France. Many families dream not only of having a primary residence but also of owning a small countryside house, a cottage by the sea, or a mountain retreat where they can spend weekends and holidays.
In some cases, these second homes have been passed down through generations. In others, they are modest vacation houses where people escape city life for a few days to enjoy nature, gardening, long lunches, and a slower pace of living.
Fun Fact 1: France Has Millions of Second Homes
France has one of the highest numbers of second homes in Europe. In some rural villages and coastal regions, a significant percentage of houses are occupied only during holidays or summer months.
This creates an interesting contrast. While many people live in apartments in major cities for work, they may also own a small house in the countryside where they spend weekends and family vacations.
Fun Fact 2: A Different Relationship with Renting
One of the biggest surprises for me was learning that renting is not viewed negatively in France. Many people rent for years, sometimes even decades, without feeling pressured to buy property immediately.
Instead of focusing exclusively on homeownership, people may prioritize travel, education, career opportunities, or lifestyle choices that give them greater flexibility.
Fun Fact 3: Family Legacy Exists in Both Cultures
At first glance, Thailand and France seem very different when it comes to housing. But there is actually an interesting similarity.
In Thailand, families often build homes with future generations in mind. In France, family properties are also commonly passed down through generations. The difference is that these inherited homes are often countryside houses or holiday homes rather than primary residences.
The more I observe these differences, the more I realize that they are not really about houses at all.
Final Thoughts
They reflect different ideas about stability.
In Thailand, stability is often represented by ownership. Having a home means putting down roots, creating a foundation for your family, and building something that will last for generations.
In France, stability may be defined differently. It can mean having the freedom to move, explore opportunities, change careers, and adapt to different stages of life without feeling tied to a single location.
Perhaps this difference is also connected to work-life balance.
Thai society has traditionally valued security, commitment, and long-term planning. Meanwhile, many people in France place a strong emphasis on quality of life, personal time, and maintaining a balance between work and leisure. These values inevitably shape how people think about where they live and what they expect from a home.
Living between these two cultures has also taught me something else: a house and a home are not always the same thing.
A house is a property.
A home is a feeling.
Sometimes home is where your family lives. Sometimes it is the country where you grew up. Sometimes it is the place where you have built a new life. And sometimes it is simply the place where you feel most like yourself.
Neither the Thai approach nor the French approach is right or wrong. They are simply reflections of different histories, lifestyles, and priorities.
As someone who has experienced both worlds, I find it fascinating how a simple concept like "home" can reveal so much about the way people choose to live their lives.
Perhaps the real question is not whether we own a home, but what kind of life we want that home to support.
If you had the choice, would you rather invest everything in one dream home, or have the freedom to live in different places throughout your life?
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